Roommate Romance

Finding a good roommate can be, well, difficult. They say it takes a few months to really get to know someone, which makes the odds of them staying as kind and as courteous as they were at “hello” pretty low. I will not get into specifics, but I can definitely claim several cases of roommate terror: that ranged from people sharing my most personal secrets, watching a boyfriend cheat on me and saying nothing, kicking me out with nowhere to go for ridiculous reason, and even just people who have turned cold on me and made going home worse than taking up a study room at the University library. Yes, the last few years were unfortunate, but they are getting better.

Because my sufferings equate to that of about a hundred young adults, I figured it is time for a wise-cracking informative article to protect young innocent women (and men) with big dreams from being stomped on by a bad roommate.

Here are a few tips to minimize roommate horror (although I can’t make any promises):

Web stalk:

Employers do this, parents do this, heck, any young woman with a boyfriend definitely does this, and it’s called virtual stalking. Virtual stalking is when one spies upon the Internet world and all of its incumbents. Although none of us will take credit for it, we often have dual personality disorder when  posting information on the Internet. Some people are extremely kind or happy (no one is that happy), others tend to be dark and perverse (I can name a few), and some are just creepy. By googling the potential roomie, you may have access to their Facebook or twitter, where they post their nude pictures, bathroom photo shoots(don’t live with one of those), or borderline criminal pics of rifles and weapons of the like. Do not feel guilty going the web stalking route. If someone is willing to share that much info on the World Wide Web, they better expect to be a frequently observed object (most often by the government).

(Oh, and don’t get carried away, remember, stalking is a crime.)

Have a Skype interview

Some people still are without webcam, but the likely hood of them or a friend having an iPhone (hello FaceTime) or another video chat device is high. Some people speak sweetly on the phone, but really look and act like potential murders, thieves, jersey hungry Kardashian wannabes, or some other kind of person that may make roommate life terrible. By the way, no judgement if you like looking beautiful and dating wealthy men, we all have to get by somehow.

Meet for coffee or dinner

I know, this is sounding more like dating every second, but if you plan on living in a place long-term then this roommate relationship needs to be treated the same. And let’s face it, some of us have had many dinners with a “long-term” partner and it still ended in disaster(maybe I only speak for myself). This way you can see if the potential roomie and you have enough in common to enjoy each others company. It’s not fun sitting in a little living room with someone who refuses to converse. We call this “awkward” where I come from.

Pay Attention

zengar.com

Many people make their character relatively obvious through conversation. If a person frequently converses about being hung over, partying, or doing lines, it’s possible that your new roomie will (at some point) need to get checked in to the ER… and you’ll be responsible for getting her (or him) there. This is what roommates do, you know?

After learning there is a special formula for finding roomie romance, I’ve finally found a perfect match. Hopefully you wonderful readers have been able to dodge traumatic living experiences in the past and will continue to in the future. If you have failed at doing so, take everything I say to heart. Everything! Remember, we are all human, which means we are all flawed. Find a flawed living companion that compliments you and eternal roommate bliss will be well on its way. Thanks for stopping by, and don’t forget to Winc..